Seriously?

As I sit here finally getting a much needed five minutes to myself while B and B grab dinner, I am almost doubled over with the pain most women dread every 30 days. Normally, this would not warrant a blog posting (and sorry to anyone who feels I'm crossing the line here), but this month I was 95% convinced I was pregnant again, and I am happy to say now that I am very glad that I am officially NOT pregnant. Not that another child would have been a problem- we certainly love B more than anything and would have gladly welcomed a sibling for him- but the timing would have been less than convenient.

I am pretty sure the world was trying to play a cruel joke on me this month. Granted, my life has had a ton of change lately: working to not working, not working out to working out daily, etc; but for someone that has been more than a day or two late no more than twice in my life (once when I was prego with B) to be eight, yes EIGHT days late was quite the 'fluke'. I took three pregnancy tests-all negative- and couldn't help but stress out non stop about each result.

I got to thinking about how I am ever going to be ready to be the mother of more than one. I have said to people that I feel like you become a real parent once you have two kids. With one, we haven't had many adjustments to our pre-kid lifestyle. Pretty much anywhere we go, B can come along, and if not, there are many volunteers willing to watch one child. I can't imagine two is as easy to pawn off on a friend or family member. I give so much credit to those that do more than one under two. I can't imagine it. I guess its more of a selfish thing. I'm not yet ready to give up my free time or sleep again.

I'm sure there will come a time when I will be ready- and don't get me wrong, there was a small part of me that was really excited about thinking I was pregnant, but as cute as babies are, they are a LOT of work that I can't say I'm ready for just yet. No worries (siblings!), we WILL have another one day, just not anytime soon!